You Did That To Yourself ELEVEN Times?

Oh my god. It's 4:30 in the morning and I'm attempting an entry as I have my first cup of coffee. I apologize to anyone reading this soon to be gibberish.

Does 4:30 seem like an unreasonable time to get up for work? I thought so. I'm up this early so I can drive an hour to work and sit in a mean little office and study a few hours before working a 9 hour day. Yes, I'm 25, I graduated Magna Cum Laude for Christ's sake, and I study everyday.

You see, actuaries have to take actuarial exams to become certified. They're basically 4 hour theoretical calculus and probability exams. And there's 8 of them (11 if you want to work in pensions, which I do). Each one is more torturous than the one before it. It's like a lawyer passing the bar ELEVEN times...

I'm on #3. There's a reason you've never heard of an actuary. There's only so many of us sick enough to do this to ourselves. You might think I'd be great at math exams, seeing as how I'm a mathematician and all, right? Turns out life is somewhat unfair, and this is the third time I'm taking #3. That's pretty average though - these exams are so tough that getting a 20% is an accomplishment. At this rate I'll be finishing up #11 just in time for my retirement party.

This mean little office I study in is a converted executives office with a broken air conditioner they could never fix and a beautiful view of the parking lot where I can watch everyone drive in happy, singing, smoking, talking on the phone... Then they park and get out of their cars. The phone is put away, the cigarette stubbed out. Their body language changes, the face drops, and these people march one by one towards the building. Each of them so disheartened and bitter about having to spend another beautiful day trapped in a cubicle.

Or maybe that's just me.