Comments:

Dianna -
I've worked for attorneys for 17 yrs. now, and I'll tell you that the guilty party always works in one of two ways: They either want to give the bum's rush to the innocent party because their co-cheater is putting pressure on them to be free; or they want to hold up the entire process so that they can control the ex-wife's moving on, but at the same time, if they're not free, they still have something to hold over the co-cheater's head. My very best advice is that your mother control the entire process. (It's part of the healing - gaining control over something.) Tell her she don't have to do a God dammed thing until she is good and ready. Make sure she gets every single thing she is entitled to. This will, again, give her the "high road" all the way through. Tell her 1,000 times, if necessary - DO NOT sign anything. A signature is not a decoration at the bottom of the page. I hope you send out those letters. They both deserve to hear what you have so eloquently said.
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fysh -
Your mom is a very very lucky woman. She will be fine. She has a hell of a lot of love to keep her her upright. I'm sure she is bursting with pride over what a wonderful son she has. *hug* I'm sorry you have to see her go through this.
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Carla -
Once again, Dianna's right on -- I hope your mom uses yours and SP's and your sisters' collective strength to get her through emotional exhaustion and the temptation it brings to acquiesce to your dad pushing her to sign off on his so-called equal parting of wealth. He damned well knows that she's got HELLA more coming in any court for 37 years of marriage.
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Xof -
Uuugh, this sucks. Simply, good luck to you and your family.
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RockyMtRangr -
Having experienced two divorces with my mom, I know how that protective mechanism kicks in. Everyone's right...she's lucky to have y'all around her. Speaking from my experience, the only thing I can offer is that you need to let her make the decisions herself, unless she specifically asks you to make them. She feels powerless over the break-up...she probably needs to feel like she has some control over how things are handled, if she's going to get a hold of her life. Take care, bud...good luck.
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bettyalready -
Hard place to be in for her. It's hard to not allow yourself to be bullied by someone when you're used to it. She must have raised you all very well, by the way.
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sunnflower -
You are one good kid and that's one thing your mom can count on through these difficult times.
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Ashley -
my parents have never gotten a divorce, but my best friend has just been through a tough time while her parents got one. luckily they mind their words around her, but they are vicious behind her back. if ur dad was really as bad as u made him out to be in this letter(i dont know what the cause of the divorce was, nor is it any of my business) then there is no reason for any of you to ever see him again after this is all said and done. i respect you for all that you have offered your mother, but i do not agree with the other responses before my own. right now your mother needs a shoulder to cry on, someone to share her feelings with. it's too soon to start the healing process, and though some say that its never too soon, they obviously havent ever gona through anything like this before. all of that time that she had trusted your dad ? that will leave a scar unless its taken care of properly, and she needs to get all of her feelings out instead of holding them in. she's lucky to have u as her kid, never withhold an offer for help when u can see that someone might, even with the tiniest chance, need it.
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luvabeans -
your maturity and rationality are inspiring considering the anger and pain you must be feeling. your mother is, indeed, a lucky woman, and i hope your father realizes what he's lost.
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